Overwhelmed by Parenthood? Remember these 5 Truths

I am smack dab in the middle of the most difficult season of parenting. Our house has gotten loud, messy and disruptive, and although I’m so grateful for my boys, I am also so exhausted. I’ve never felt so overwhelmed in my entire life, yet I have never felt a love like I have since becoming a mother. That’s the funny thing about parenthood. We love it, yet we are so overwhelmed by it, but for good reason.

I cannot remember the last time my husband and I have put ourselves or our marriage before our children and their needs. We literally bend over backwards for them, when we’re struggling to stay above the surface ourselves. That’s love. That’s what parenthood is all about. There are some things that don’t get the attention they deserve, and I’m working on that, but at the end of the day the important thing is that my kids are healthy and happy.

Every morning I’m battling with my five year old to get dressed. My toddler is chasing the dog throughout the house with his toy broom striking him whenever he is within striking distance. We hurry out of the house feeling hustled and irritated. At dinner time, my five year old complains about having the wrong pasta sauce on his spaghetti while my toddler throws his food. Meanwhile, our dog is barking at nothing while our cat tries escaping out of the house whenever possible.

My house is in a constant state of chaos. Pure and utter chaos, and lately it’s been bringing me to my knees. Through the tantrums and tears, I have resorted to just believing that I am a bad mother. A struggling mother who doesn’t see the joy in every season of parenthood. The struggling mother with dark circles under her eyes. The struggling mother with a bit more weight around her mid-section still wearing yesterday’s make-up.

And although I’m aware that this is just a season, it’s a damn hard one.

I’ve never been so overwhelmed.

Each morning I wake up with the best intentions. I tell myself that I won’t yell today. I’ll try to be more patient and understanding. I plan on being the best mom ever, then I’m disappointed when it doesn’t go the way I had hoped it would go.

We have ALL been there. The job of motherhood is an amazing gift for all those who get to experience it. Some days I literally live for best time so I can have an adult conversation with my husband and finally sit down. And some days I just feel like I’m failing.

Here are FIVE truths I constantly need to remind myself of when I find myself struggling with motherhood.

One Day Doesn’t Define their Childhood

Here’s the gosh darn honest truth. Bad days WILL happen. Bad decisions WILL happen. We WILL make choices we are not proud and we WILL say things we later regret. Here’s the deal, these things do not define their childhood. They’re going to turn out just fine.

Don’t Mother to Other’s Expectations

We live in a world where we are bombarded with all of these crazy expectations set by random strangers on the internet. We start to compare ourselves and then we find ourselves trying to keep up with someone we don’t even know. That’s crazy!

Do not let other’s expectations be your own. Oftentimes these expectations are unrealistic, so you’re going to set yourself up for failure if you try mothering to those expectations. You do you.

Your Failures Do Not Define You as a Mother

We are all learning how to be a mom. We aren’t born with this incredibly innate ability to be the best mom. We will make mistakes, but that’s part of the learning and growing process. We are humans so mistakes will be made. We screw up daily, but we must give ourselves some grace.

You are not defined by your failures. This is not WHO you are.

The Mere Fact that you’re Questioning your Parenting PROVES you aren’t Failing as a Mother

Plain and simple, if you didn’t care how well you were doing as a parent, you’re probably not a great parent. If you care enough to question if you’re failing as a parent, you’re a bomb-ass parent.

Instead of throwing your hands up in defeat, you tackle this journey day in and day out. Maybe not every day is handledso gracefully, but you refuse to give up. Remember that fact.

 

This is JUST a Season

I know we all hear this daily, and it seems so cliché and not helpful, but it is JUST a season. Although it sucks and you’re overwhelmed, remember that the season of parenthood includes so much joy, tears, frustration, success, laughter, anger and literally everything in between.

It’s ok to struggle. It’s ok to not have it all figured out. It’s ok to cry. It’s ok to yell. The hardest part of this season is truly understanding that it’s just that..a season. One which will be over before we know it. These often-difficult season will mold us in the parents we were meant to be.

The season of parenthood includes ALL of the good days, ALL of the bad days and everything in between.