20 Things I Learned Through 20 Rounds of Chemotherapy

March 24, 2025 – June 2, 2026

On March 24, 2025, I sat in a chemo chair for the first time after my cancer returned. At the time, I had no idea how much life would change over the next 435 days.

Twenty rounds of chemotherapy.
Countless appointments.
Scans. Needles. Side effects. Fear. Waiting rooms. Tears.

And somehow…also laughter, perspective, gratitude, and strength I didn’t know I had.

When people hear “20 rounds of chemo,” they often focus on the physical part of it. The sickness. The fatigue. The hair loss. And yes, those things are very real. But chemotherapy changes so much more than your body. It changes the way you see time, relationships, priorities, and yourself.

Here are 20 things I learned through 20 rounds of chemotherapy.

1. Your body is capable of more than you ever imagined.

Even on days I felt completely drained, my body kept going. It carried me through treatment after treatment, even when my mind wanted to quit.

2. Strength doesn’t always look strong.

Sometimes strength looks like showing up to treatment scared out of your mind. Sometimes it looks like crying in the car and walking into the appointment anyway.

3. Rest is productive too.

Before cancer, I believed productivity meant constantly doing. Chemo taught me that healing is work too.

4. Hair loss hurts more emotionally than people realize.

It’s not “just hair.” It’s identity. Privacy. Confidence. Control. Losing it can feel like losing pieces of yourself.

5. The little things become the big things.

Good lab results. A nap without nausea. Coffee tasting normal again. A sunset. A text from a friend. You start noticing everything.

6. People will surprise you.

Some people show up in incredible ways. Others disappear quietly. Cancer has a way of revealing who can truly sit with hard things.

7. Your circle may get smaller—but more genuine.

Chemo taught me to value depth over quantity in relationships.

8. Cancer changes your relationship with time.

You stop assuming there will always be “later.” You become more intentional with your days, your energy, and your people.

9. You learn to celebrate ordinary days.

The days without appointments. The days where you can cook dinner. The days where life feels boring. Those become gifts.

10. There is no “right” way to fight cancer.

Some people stay positive. Some people rage. Some people laugh through it. Some people completely fall apart. All of it is valid.

11. Mental health matters just as much as physical health.

Cancer affects every part of you—not just your body. Anxiety, grief, fear, and trauma deserve attention too.

12. Survival can look different every day.

Some days survival meant advocating for myself. Other days it meant getting out of bed. Sometimes it meant letting myself completely break down.

13. “You look good” can feel complicated.

People often mean well, but cancer teaches you that appearance rarely reflects reality.

14. Your body may change, but your worth does not.

Scars. Flatness. Weight changes. Ports. Baldness. None of those things determine your value.

15. Asking for help is not weakness.

This was one of the hardest lessons for me. People genuinely want to help—you don’t have to carry everything alone.

16. Caregivers are fighting too.

Cancer impacts entire families. My husband, my kids, my loved ones—they’ve carried this battle beside me in ways people may never fully see.

17. Kids are incredibly resilient.

They notice more than we think, but they also love harder than we expect. My children have taught me as much as I’ve taught them.

18. You stop sweating the small stuff.

Cancer has a way of reorganizing your priorities very quickly.

19. Gratitude and grief can exist at the same time.

I’ve felt thankful and devastated simultaneously. Both emotions can live together.

20. Life after chemotherapy is not about “going back.”

People often talk about returning to normal after treatment. But the truth is, cancer changes you. The goal isn’t becoming the old version of yourself again. It’s learning to love and trust the new version of yourself that survived.

**

From March 24, 2025 to June 2, 2026:

• 20 rounds of chemotherapy
• 435 days
• Over 626,000 minutes spent fighting for my life

Cancer took a lot from me. But it also revealed parts of me I never knew existed.

And while I would never choose this journey, I am incredibly proud of the person who survived it.