The Magic of Friendship with Other ADHD Moms

Having ADHD can be a wild ride. Between juggling the demands of parenthood, the challenges of managing a household, and trying to remember where we left our keys, moms with ADHD are in a category all their own. But add other ADHD moms into the mix, and you find something magical: friendship that feels like coming home. Here’s why having friends who “get it” makes all the difference, and how to nurture these unique and deeply supportive friendships.

1. They Understand the Chaos

With ADHD, it’s not uncommon for our lives to feel like controlled chaos. And for an ADHD mom, the struggle is very real. Trying to get kids ready, keep the house in order, and manage a dozen other tasks can be exhausting. Friends with ADHD understand the unique challenge because they’re living it too. If your house is a bit of a mess, or you’re running 10 minutes late (again), they won’t judge; they’ll just laugh and tell you they were 10 minutes late to their last meet-up too.

2. They Know How ADHD “Brain Fog” Feels

Ever tried having a conversation, only to lose track of your point halfway through? Or start one task and immediately get sidetracked by five others? ADHD moms know exactly what it’s like to feel lost in the fog of distractions and shifting thoughts. They understand when you’re talking about your day and suddenly jump topics or can’t remember why you walked into the room. It’s the mutual laughter over these “brain fog” moments that turns potential frustration into shared, joyful acceptance.

3. They’re Flexible in Ways That Matter

ADHD comes with unpredictability, and having friends who understand that you can’t always stick to a schedule is a game-changer. Plans may change last minute because your brain is suddenly too overwhelmed, or maybe you forgot about a previous commitment. ADHD mom friends get it. They won’t be upset if you need to reschedule at the last minute—they’re likely to appreciate the flexibility because it frees them up to tackle their own (probably disorganized) to-do list.

4. They Offer a Judgment-Free Zone

Motherhood can come with its own set of guilt trips. Add ADHD into the mix, and the pressures of parenting can feel like an impossible mountain to climb. But ADHD mom friends create a safe, judgment-free space to share parenting challenges, worries, and successes. They understand that “small wins” (like finally finding time to clean out the car) are worth celebrating, and they know not to judge if you’re struggling to keep up. When one of you succeeds, it feels like everyone wins.

5. They Get Creative with Solutions

ADHD moms are the queens of thinking outside the box. When parenting gets tough, or ADHD symptoms interfere with life, they’ll have a treasure trove of creative solutions they’re more than willing to share. They know about routines that actually work for ADHD brains, the apps that help keep track of appointments, and tricks to remember deadlines. Together, you can swap ideas, experiment with new strategies, and make your own playbook for making life easier.

6. They Make Life Feel Lighter

Friendship with other ADHD moms brings an undeniable sense of camaraderie. You can laugh at the quirks of ADHD together, share stories of the last time you misplaced your phone (or your child’s lunch), and celebrate surviving another hectic week. These friends lift each other up, remind one another that they’re not alone, and share in the humor of all the beautiful, chaotic moments that come with the territory.

How to Nurture ADHD Mom Friendships

• Communicate Openly: Life is unpredictable, and ADHD only makes it more so. Let your friends know you value their understanding and appreciate their flexibility. Keep open communication about how you’re feeling and share when you’re overwhelmed.
• Be Understanding and Patient: Just as you need a little patience from your friends, they’ll need it from you. ADHD mom friends are balancing similar challenges, so be mindful if they’re occasionally late, forgetful, or struggling.
• Celebrate the Little Wins: Whether it’s getting all the kids dressed on time or remembering a parent-teacher meeting, celebrate your little achievements together. Sometimes, it’s these small moments of victory that make the hard days bearable.
• Create a Group Chat: Having a group chat with your ADHD mom friends can be a lifeline. You can check in with each other, share tips, commiserate about struggles, and remind each other of important things you might forget.
• Encourage Each Other’s Self-Care: ADHD moms often put themselves last, so remind one another to take care of yourselves. Share self-care ideas, book a coffee date, or cheer each other on to rest when needed.

Embracing the Joy of ADHD Friendships

Being friends with other ADHD moms isn’t just about companionship; it’s about acceptance, understanding, and belonging. When you surround yourself with people who truly understand the unique challenges you face, life feels a little less overwhelming and a lot more joyful. Together, you can laugh through the chaos, cheer each other on, and remind one another that no one’s alone on this ADHD journey. So cherish these friendships—they’re a lifeline, a source of strength, and a reminder that, in all the beautiful mess, you’re doing great.