Thoughts on Raising a Deaf Child
I cannot even put into words the amount of emotions associated with raising a deaf child. There is fear, there is hope, there is grief, there is sadness, there is joy and there is so much unknowns.
If you have been following Beckett’s Journey to Hearing, you already know that my son, Beckett, is 8 months old and is profoundly deaf. His hearing loss is associated with Connexin 26, a protein found on the (GJB2) gene and is the most common cause of congenital sensorineural hearing loss. He currently wears hearing aids as we prepare for his bilateral cochlear implant surgery later this summer.
Even with that surgery, when he is not wearing his devices, he lives in a silent world.
He is and will always be deaf.
Here are a few things to realize as a hearing parent of a deaf child.
Expectations and Treatment
I tend to be instinctively protective, and I’m even more so towards Beckett. I try not to make more fuss over him than I do my older son, but I can’t help it to an extent. He’s been through so much in the 8 months he’s been with us.
I understand that though his hearing loss is permanent and he will require head gear to hear as well as additional support, he truly is no different from any other child. I pray that he knows that. His father, big brother and I do not treat him any differently, and we want Beckett to know that he shouldn’t be treated any differently.
When I first found out that my son was deaf, I had these unclear and unrealistic expectations for him. It revolved around his being treated differently and his learning. I expect some things will be delayed as far as his speech, but with speech pathologists, he should be just fine.
Communication
I’m learning, and I’ll continue to learn patience with my son. He’s still young, but I know that I’ll have to be more patient with him because his little brain is processing information differently than hearing individuals would. His brain is working harder to interpret what he is hearing. I know that he will be frustrated while trying to communicate with us, and as a parent, it’s my job to encourage and help him through his communication struggles. That is one of the reasons I am learning to sign, so that we have another way to communicate.
I highly encourage those in Beckett’s life to learn basic signs as well.
Support
I tend to spend a lot of time worrying about the future. I’m worried about him being bullied when he’s older. I’m worried about his feeling different and his confidence. I’m worried how people will treat him, but one thing I’m learning early on in this journey is that most people either don’t notice his hearing aids or accept Beckett as he is no questions asked. I can only imagine that it’ll be the same once he gets cochlear implants.
I also have to understand that ANY child can be bullied, whether they have a disability or not. There are a million ways why children are bullied, and I cannot assume that just because my son has hearing loss, that he will be targeted even more so. The fear of a child getting bullied is the same for myself as any other parent. The only thing I can control is to raise both of my boys with respect and teach them that bulling is wrong.
Beckett is still so young. He doesn’t even have his cochlear implants yet, and his father, his brother and I are still learning what it means to have a son and a brother with hearing loss. We’re all working together to help Beckett reach his full potential and will forever support him, encourage him and love him.
What are your thoughts on raising a deaf child?
